"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind.
Some come from ahead and some come from behind.
But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see.
Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!"
~ Dr. Seuss

3/31/08
Calculus, Be not proud
((with appologies to the author of "Death, be not Proud"))

Calculus, be not proud, though some have called thee
The Krav Maga of math, for that's actually a fair assessment...
For those whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow
fail not, poor calculus; nor yet hast thou derived me.
From Y and X, of which thy formulas be,
The Answers, then from thee many will flow;
And soonest our best students with thee do go -
Wrested of their grades by their tests delivery.
Thou'rt slave to F(x), delta x, k, and desperate minds,
And dost with Disks, washers, and Integrals dwell;
And multiple choice or free response can make us cry as well
And better than any English essay. Why swell'st thou dy/dx then?
One short-or-long formula past, we know the answer eternally,
And Calculus shall be no more. CALCULUS, THOU SHALT BE DIVIDED BY INFINITY!